Today, I met a lord.
Introduction to real life had dulled his sword.
His swagger had lost its bearing.
His Igbo accent wasn’t as glaring.
Oh my lord, what happened to your soul?
You were always ready to argue
Rearing to go
Now your eyes have lost their sparkle
I wonder what has happened
The most shocking part of it all is that you did not even try.
Remember that joke dry
You've changed in some ways
But it's not written on your face.
After all this, what can I say?
It was nice to meet you again,
My lord
I took a stroll to the Distance Learning Institute in my school and this happened. The sky was soooo blue. The clouds were soooo white The leaves were soooo green. Everything was colourful! And people wonder why I don't have a favourite colour.
I took all the pictures with my Tecno Spark. Leave a comment and tell me what you think. You can also see more of my photography on Instagram @mynes.ip
Have you ever whined and cried for something so bad but when you got it, you wondered why you asked? I've been asking God for some things for about 4-5 months and now that I have them, I wonder why I really wanted them. I asked for freedom, now it’s too much. I asked for money, now it’s too much. I'm not used to having so much that I don’t know what to do with it. I asked for my own space and now, it’s lonely. I used to stay in an apartment with 7 girls and sometimes it got really rowdy but they kept me sane. They kept me safe. Now that I'm not on my own, I really don’t know what I should be doing.
Being with like-minded people does something to you. You tend to have the same ideologies on matters in a general sense. Now that I don’t live with them, my mind has begun to roam free. And now, I am confused.
I just turned 21 which means I'm meant to get my act together, be grown up and responsible. I have to know what I want to do with my life. I have to stand fiercely for something or fall for anything. I’ve been asking myself if the life I’ve lived for the past 4 years is the one I want to live for the next 70. I’ve been asking myself what I really want. I've been asking myself who I really am. And who I want to be.
I'm not a feminist. I’m sorry ladies, I don’t care about women’s rights strongly enough to base my life on it. I'm not a human or child rights activist. I am passionate about women and children’s rights but not so much to live for it all my days. I'm not a lawyer. I've “studied” law for almost 5 years and my love for it has only reduced over time. I'm not a slay queen or a fashionista..
For the past 4 years, I've slowly but surely began to stand for Christ and I haven’t regretted it. Not one bit. B U T, the older I got, the more enticing the world got and now it’s like the world is after me. Literally. From boys to success to money to friends. In the midst of all this, I'm still asking myself this question..
What do I stand for?
Dear Reader,
Hi. How are you? I know it has been a while and I'm truly sorry. It was an accident. And to those who are surprised, yes! I'm alive! I have been offline in more ways than one. Let me explain. No phone and no laptop. I don't have a phone. What I have kind of looks like this picture. It's a Lumia and the camera is just terrible. I call it a handset, calling machine or better yet, a limitation. So I'm not on Instagram, Snapchat, and even common Facebook that I wrote off.I gave my laptop to a friend for a project a while ago and I just got it back on Monday. So you see, offline. I'm back, I hope. but I'm a bit limited in the things I can do. My phone was my camera and I used it to post on the blog a lot. Now with my handset.. sigh.
Anyway, enough about my availability. I'm trying to gist you about my life. I'm currently in school. Exams are in a little while so you can expect another disappearance soon. Apart from that... Nada. Zilch. Nothing. My life isn't so exciting, if you haven't already guessed but I like it that way. I have a trip coming up really soon. Next month actually. I hope I can take a lot of pictures and tell you about it.
I just want you to know that I'm thinking about you. I wonder how and where you are. I wonder what you look like too. I also wish you'd comment sometimes and tell me to come back when I disappear but I'll take what I can get. I hope I can inspire you for a while
Love, Damimyne.
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| This is a recent picture of me looking silly |
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| There's a diva in me! |
Today, my mum told me that it took her over 3 days to give birth to me. She went into Labour on the 11th and was placed on admission in a hospital close to our house before she was moved to Ayinke house, LASUTH, Lagos. Basically she started on the 11th and she had me on the 14th. It was a Monday. On that day, the sun must have been so beautiful and the sky so blue and blah blah blah. I was eventually birthed through a C-section and several years later, I'm just finding out.
Tomorrow is my birthday and I'm so excited. Guess what? I have plans. Yay! Two years ago, I had the worst birthday ever. The worst. Apart from my family only about 5 people wished me a happy birthday. I was miserable! I had classes on that day till 6pm! Sigh.. Enough venting.. For now. *insert evil smirk*.
Anyways back to my plans. I was so stumped about what to do. Movie? Nehh! Party? Blehh! That's it. My span of ideas for a birthday. Sigh again. I know, I know. Anyway, I decided to ask the Giver of all for a birthday idea and I got one that pleases me immensely. I'm going to the Lekki Conservation Centre and the Palms shopping Mall, both in Lekki, Lagos. The island (Lagos island) has always held a special charm for me. There's just something magical about it. Call me crazy, I'll still think so. I mean, there's the iconic ocean, the beaches, the tall buildings, the sand in your shoes, the general tushness of that area speaks to me.
What influenced my choices? The Lekki Conservation Centre is a wild life reserve centre and it's amazing that I've never heard of it before this week. I mean, I know I'm a house rat and all but a wild life resort in Lagos?? Thank you Google. I love nature and sightseeing. The two-in-one package is irresistible for me. And then I've never been to the Palms Shopping Mall. I can't wait to unleash myself on a mall that boasts of over 30 shops.
I'll tell y'all all about it. See you on the other side and happy new year to me and all April born. Muah!
Tomorrow is my birthday and I'm so excited. Guess what? I have plans. Yay! Two years ago, I had the worst birthday ever. The worst. Apart from my family only about 5 people wished me a happy birthday. I was miserable! I had classes on that day till 6pm! Sigh.. Enough venting.. For now. *insert evil smirk*.
Anyways back to my plans. I was so stumped about what to do. Movie? Nehh! Party? Blehh! That's it. My span of ideas for a birthday. Sigh again. I know, I know. Anyway, I decided to ask the Giver of all for a birthday idea and I got one that pleases me immensely. I'm going to the Lekki Conservation Centre and the Palms shopping Mall, both in Lekki, Lagos. The island (Lagos island) has always held a special charm for me. There's just something magical about it. Call me crazy, I'll still think so. I mean, there's the iconic ocean, the beaches, the tall buildings, the sand in your shoes, the general tushness of that area speaks to me.
What influenced my choices? The Lekki Conservation Centre is a wild life reserve centre and it's amazing that I've never heard of it before this week. I mean, I know I'm a house rat and all but a wild life resort in Lagos?? Thank you Google. I love nature and sightseeing. The two-in-one package is irresistible for me. And then I've never been to the Palms Shopping Mall. I can't wait to unleash myself on a mall that boasts of over 30 shops.
I'll tell y'all all about it. See you on the other side and happy new year to me and all April born. Muah!
I've loved and lost a lot in my not so long life on earth. I'm talking about people... friends, ex friends or whatever those are called. I've been feeling nostalgic for a couple of days, a week maybe? What can say? I miss some people and as for some others, I can't believe I ever had anything to do with them.
There's a song I used to love.it It simply said "no matter what happens I've got my friends". It was a nice touching sentiment but sometimes, friends lie, friends aren't genuine, sometimes they use you, hurt you, sometimes friends leave you. Sometimes your friends aren't really your friends and it's all fun and games till you need them. I'm really not against having friends as long as you know who they really are.
You know, I've always wanted a bff (best friend forever) but I don't think it's in God's plan for my life. Some of my best friends and I lost touch cus of school, misunderstandings and sometimes it was because I realized that I was the only one who was really willing to give or go the extra mile. Have you ever done something for someone that cost you something? Then imagine the pain when you realize they wouldn't do the same for you.
I've moved into a hostel in school very recently and I find myself wanting friends around me. The problem is I'm too socially awkward to flow with everyone or just anyone. A lot of people think I'm amazing but still I don't have that one friend (or more, I really don't mind) that I can call my ride or die. We always lose touch, drift apart, fight... Something. I've become a lone ranger as a result. Learned to be happy by myself
Sometimes, you don't realize you've learnt a lesson until something happens more than once. You do exactly the same things and hope for something different each time. You're actually quite mad according to a wise guy who's dead.
I guess I just feel old because I know how different I've become. I have a lot of responsibilities on my shoulders and a lesser number of people I can call my friends. I miss some of the ones I've lost. My ex best friend, some that tried to get out of the friend zone and some that I'm just too shy to say hello to. Its kind of amazing that I used to be close to some people and now I barely know what to say to then.
And then there are some people I will just never miss. Ever. Like never ever ever ever never ever. Keep your Justin Bieber comebacks, thank you very much. - Damimyne
There's a song I used to love.it It simply said "no matter what happens I've got my friends". It was a nice touching sentiment but sometimes, friends lie, friends aren't genuine, sometimes they use you, hurt you, sometimes friends leave you. Sometimes your friends aren't really your friends and it's all fun and games till you need them. I'm really not against having friends as long as you know who they really are.
You know, I've always wanted a bff (best friend forever) but I don't think it's in God's plan for my life. Some of my best friends and I lost touch cus of school, misunderstandings and sometimes it was because I realized that I was the only one who was really willing to give or go the extra mile. Have you ever done something for someone that cost you something? Then imagine the pain when you realize they wouldn't do the same for you.
I've moved into a hostel in school very recently and I find myself wanting friends around me. The problem is I'm too socially awkward to flow with everyone or just anyone. A lot of people think I'm amazing but still I don't have that one friend (or more, I really don't mind) that I can call my ride or die. We always lose touch, drift apart, fight... Something. I've become a lone ranger as a result. Learned to be happy by myself
Sometimes, you don't realize you've learnt a lesson until something happens more than once. You do exactly the same things and hope for something different each time. You're actually quite mad according to a wise guy who's dead.
I guess I just feel old because I know how different I've become. I have a lot of responsibilities on my shoulders and a lesser number of people I can call my friends. I miss some of the ones I've lost. My ex best friend, some that tried to get out of the friend zone and some that I'm just too shy to say hello to. Its kind of amazing that I used to be close to some people and now I barely know what to say to then.
And then there are some people I will just never miss. Ever. Like never ever ever ever never ever. Keep your Justin Bieber comebacks, thank you very much. - Damimyne
I want to go somewhere
Somewhere not here.
I want to go somewhere
Somewhere far away.
I want to go to a place
A place where dreams come true
Somewhere not here.
I want to go somewhere
Somewhere far away.
I want to go to a place
A place where dreams come true
Where life is simple;
Where things are easy;
Where it's not too hot;
Where it's not too cold;
Where the breeze brings joy;
Where the sun brings laughter.
Where things are easy;
Where it's not too hot;
Where it's not too cold;
Where the breeze brings joy;
Where the sun brings laughter.
I want to go somewhere,
Somewhere people don't cry;
Somewhere they don't fall sick;
Somewhere they never die.
I want to go somewhere,
Somewhere real,
Somewhere that really exists,
And is not just in my head.
Somewhere people don't cry;
Somewhere they don't fall sick;
Somewhere they never die.
I want to go somewhere,
Somewhere real,
Somewhere that really exists,
And is not just in my head.
I want to escape,
I want to be free,
I want to be free,
I want to be me.
I want to go somewhere,
Somewhere called paradise
He's someone I haven't seen in a long time. Is three years long enough? We met in 2012, the year I graduated from high school and he's one of the few people who's made effort to keep in touch. A few weeks ago he called me, and we talked for an hour, in the afternoon, in Nigeria. I can't remember over half of the conversation but it was great.
He schools in Enugu but he came back to Lagos last week. I just had to see him. He tried to see me last year but I kinda stood him up cus I had classes. We agreed that today was the best day to meet. And our meeting point? Ikeja City Mall (ICM). If you live in Lagos and you've ever tried to hangout with friends, you'll understand that good hangout spots that are cheap are almost impossible to find. If you disagree, send me an email. Please.
I window shopped at MRP while waiting for him (yea, the big teddy was late) and I thought it was really creepy that a security guard, who was probably supposed to make sure no one was shop lifting, tried to show me bras because they were cheap. They were 32a bras that went for N400 which he claimed were my size. I slipped away inch by inch. And gave him a look that said "okaaaye".
Finally he arrived, 21 minutes late and we decided to watch a movie, Southpaw, after arguing about what movie to watch for almost 10 minutes. It was a cool movie about a boxer who lost his wife, destroyed his career and almost lost his daughter and later got it back together. I don't think I want to do a movie review. PS. His wife died.
After the movie, I dragged him into shoprite on a hunt for nutri C Fruit and Veg. Fuel isn't as scarce that thing. Even Shoprite didn't have it. Then I decided to walk around the whole of Shop rite, playing hide and seek in between aisles. It gave me an idea of how shopping with my husband will be when I get married. Absolute fun! We got to the section for bathing soap, deodorant and hair products, this lady gave me a flier for a relaxer kit. I was mortified, horrified and terrified. Why? I have natural hair, that's why. How could she? I'm a bit of a drama queen and I'm sure she regretted talking to me at the end of our conversation. I was actually shaken up but I didn't take offence.
I left ICM wishing I could stay with my friend but the goodbyes had to be said. As I write this, I am currently in a bus on my way home and the seat is just hard.
Sayonara!
Ps. I really am learning Spanish.
He schools in Enugu but he came back to Lagos last week. I just had to see him. He tried to see me last year but I kinda stood him up cus I had classes. We agreed that today was the best day to meet. And our meeting point? Ikeja City Mall (ICM). If you live in Lagos and you've ever tried to hangout with friends, you'll understand that good hangout spots that are cheap are almost impossible to find. If you disagree, send me an email. Please.
I window shopped at MRP while waiting for him (yea, the big teddy was late) and I thought it was really creepy that a security guard, who was probably supposed to make sure no one was shop lifting, tried to show me bras because they were cheap. They were 32a bras that went for N400 which he claimed were my size. I slipped away inch by inch. And gave him a look that said "okaaaye".
Finally he arrived, 21 minutes late and we decided to watch a movie, Southpaw, after arguing about what movie to watch for almost 10 minutes. It was a cool movie about a boxer who lost his wife, destroyed his career and almost lost his daughter and later got it back together. I don't think I want to do a movie review. PS. His wife died.
After the movie, I dragged him into shoprite on a hunt for nutri C Fruit and Veg. Fuel isn't as scarce that thing. Even Shoprite didn't have it. Then I decided to walk around the whole of Shop rite, playing hide and seek in between aisles. It gave me an idea of how shopping with my husband will be when I get married. Absolute fun! We got to the section for bathing soap, deodorant and hair products, this lady gave me a flier for a relaxer kit. I was mortified, horrified and terrified. Why? I have natural hair, that's why. How could she? I'm a bit of a drama queen and I'm sure she regretted talking to me at the end of our conversation. I was actually shaken up but I didn't take offence.
I left ICM wishing I could stay with my friend but the goodbyes had to be said. As I write this, I am currently in a bus on my way home and the seat is just hard.
Sayonara!
Ps. I really am learning Spanish.
And my personal favourite...
Yes! I can totally be a model.
Selfie!
And photo credits go to....this little cuteheart.
Thank you to everyone who took their time and data or free Wi-Fi opportunities, whichever the case may be, to check out my blog. Thank you all so much for the wonderful feedback. After I published my first two posts, I started asking myself questions and wondering about the devil that pushed me. I felt like I had been too honest and I'd always felt like I wasnt a good writer. I needed a second opinion.
I asked my close friends to read the blog posts and tell me what they thought. They said nice and encouraging things and I got excited then I decided to ask a few more people. I got almost the same replies. I decided another set of a-few-more people till I had asked almost everyone on my contact lists. I got basically the same replies with a few twitches here and there. All was good till I got it in my head that all those people somehow got together, connived and lied to me.
I asked my close friends to read the blog posts and tell me what they thought. They said nice and encouraging things and I got excited then I decided to ask a few more people. I got almost the same replies. I decided another set of a-few-more people till I had asked almost everyone on my contact lists. I got basically the same replies with a few twitches here and there. All was good till I got it in my head that all those people somehow got together, connived and lied to me.
It's a new year and ultimately, our lives must start again. For me, the holidays were a much needed break from all the drama and stress of school. It's nice to know I'm done with my first year and I came out in one piece. "Was it that bad?", you might ask. Yes! It was. Half the time, I was too happy and too hyper, while the other half, I was too reserved and too depressed. They say high school is hard. It is, till you get into college or a university.
Being in a college or a university is very different from being in high school but it's really not that different. The main variation is the amount of freedom and then again, that really depends on the kind of parents you have. The awareness that no one back home knows what you're doing, and that you can't be punished or scolded. And then you go wild. If you're like me, you aren't really close to your parents and you don't have mentors or role models or the right guidance so it's easier to get lost. To fit in and flow with the river of sameness and unoriginality. Finding and extricating yourself is harder than getting in.
I'd like to tell you a nice, interesting story of how I lost and found myself but sadly or maybe luckily, it didn't happen. I didn't go wild and start partying like crazy. I didn't become a first class bitch. Third class maybe. But almost never on purpose. Why? because I was heart broken.
Imagine a situation where your boyfriend or girlfriend dumps you on one day that was supposed to be a very important one for you, like your matriculation day. He or she is even supposed to be there with you and for you but you get a break up text.It shattered me though I never let on. I had friends and family to be there for and a life to live. Have you ever had to restrain yourself from crying in a public place? Like a bus. You really want to give in but you remember all those people around you and you realize you might become an overnight Youtube celebrity if you don't hold it. Tough choice, I know. But I didn't become a Youtube celebrity. Big girls don't cry.
So I moved on from boy to boy to boy, desperately looking for love when it was with me all that time. Not in a boy but in my heavenly father. It's crazy how a few words from him can calm your worst fears. I'm not a perfect sister. I'm still a big work in progress but I realized that I had to wait for the love I was desperately searching for it would come at its time.
It's a new year and I'm moving on, I'm growing and I will not follow the tide. I will be my awkward self even if I get laughed at or made fun of. Why should you be bothered by the opinions of people who don't care about you? The people you have to impress or look good for don't care.. except they're your boss,
I'm writing from a place of pain but in that pain, I have peace because God loves me.
p.s I hope no one in my family reads this till I'm 50!
Being in a college or a university is very different from being in high school but it's really not that different. The main variation is the amount of freedom and then again, that really depends on the kind of parents you have. The awareness that no one back home knows what you're doing, and that you can't be punished or scolded. And then you go wild. If you're like me, you aren't really close to your parents and you don't have mentors or role models or the right guidance so it's easier to get lost. To fit in and flow with the river of sameness and unoriginality. Finding and extricating yourself is harder than getting in.
I'd like to tell you a nice, interesting story of how I lost and found myself but sadly or maybe luckily, it didn't happen. I didn't go wild and start partying like crazy. I didn't become a first class bitch. Third class maybe. But almost never on purpose. Why? because I was heart broken.
Imagine a situation where your boyfriend or girlfriend dumps you on one day that was supposed to be a very important one for you, like your matriculation day. He or she is even supposed to be there with you and for you but you get a break up text.It shattered me though I never let on. I had friends and family to be there for and a life to live. Have you ever had to restrain yourself from crying in a public place? Like a bus. You really want to give in but you remember all those people around you and you realize you might become an overnight Youtube celebrity if you don't hold it. Tough choice, I know. But I didn't become a Youtube celebrity. Big girls don't cry.
So I moved on from boy to boy to boy, desperately looking for love when it was with me all that time. Not in a boy but in my heavenly father. It's crazy how a few words from him can calm your worst fears. I'm not a perfect sister. I'm still a big work in progress but I realized that I had to wait for the love I was desperately searching for it would come at its time.
It's a new year and I'm moving on, I'm growing and I will not follow the tide. I will be my awkward self even if I get laughed at or made fun of. Why should you be bothered by the opinions of people who don't care about you? The people you have to impress or look good for don't care.. except they're your boss,
I'm writing from a place of pain but in that pain, I have peace because God loves me.
p.s I hope no one in my family reads this till I'm 50!
